197 Miles, Chocolate Kisses, and a Blowup-Sheep

Once a year in late August, 12000+ runners gather at Timberline Lodge, on the edge of Mt. Hood, the tallest mountain in Oregon. Over the course of more than 8 hours, 1000 teams, each with 12 members, embark on a 197 mile relay race ending at the beach in Seaside, Oregon. This is the Hood to Coast Relay.

Each person gets to run approximately 16.5 miles on three separate 5.5 mile runs. This is a race of epic proportions, no doubt about that. If all the numbers sound big, it’s because they are.

You’d better bring your A-game kiddos. If you slacked on your training or push it too hard on your first leg of this race, get ready to play the pain game. I’ve managed to pretty much cripple myself in the race on a couple of occasions. The adrenaline got to me, I went to fast and too hard, and I was (for all intents and purposes) paralyzed for three or four days following the event.

But the reward is always worth it, despite any temporary paralysis one might suffer. You get a keen little medal, photos with which to re-live the glory, and some radical memories. I have seen some crazy stuff in the race, and something new and unexpected happens every year. I once saw Robert (below righht) run his third and final leg, walk 30 feet, spy a bratwurst stand, and immediately consume TWO onion laden dogs. He may not clock the quickest mile time, but that is impressive.

For the last few years, I've run with a group of people from work. Our team name is “CH2M Hill Free Chocolate”, and we live up to the name. Hershey’s Kisses fly from the windows of our vans at runners, spectators, volunteers, and anybody else within throwing range. Nobody gets away from us without at least being offered some chocolate goodness. You can see from photo below that we even fastened an enlarged Kiss to the top of our vans this last year so people could recognize us. Thanks for the craftsmanship Robert,.. We are becoming quite famous it turns out. Teams recognize us and remember the free chocolate we handed out in past years. Some people see the van and come running for their free chocolate handout.

Speaking of famous, Kerry (above left), was quite popular during this year's race, as she was found to have a sizeable male entourage following her along the course. We kept track of her suitors on the side of the van (below). Rest assured the tick marks numbered well into the double digits by the end of the race.

And you would be surprised how much free stuff people want to give to us in return for chocolate handouts! I have personally received a water bottle, Frisbee, Rockstar energy drink, friendship bracelet, and my personal favorite, a Corona. And our “Kiss for a Kiss” policy is always in effect. You give us a kiss, and we give you one in return, *wink*. No takers yet, although we get closer each year as our reputation grows.

A big part of the race is van decoration. Each team has two vans, 6 runners per van. Sometimes similar decorative themes on the two team vans can help with identification at major exchange points. Mostly the artwork is just to get attention. The amount of explicit van decorations (blowup dolls, blowup sheep, undergarments, prophylactics, suggestive material, and flat out nudity) got to a bit much a couple years ago, so race officials had to tone it down this year. This was disappointing to some, but ultimately appropriate. Although I will miss that blowup sheep. Two years ago I deposited a Kiss “in” the sheep (it was strapped to the top of another team's van),… you know, anatomically correct and all that. This year, the same team (with the blowup sheep once again riding high atop their van) spotted our van and figured out that the Kiss from last year must have been our doing. I confessed to the whole thing; Everybody found it very funny. We laughed, told stories, and then continued on our death march towards the coast. See how blowup sheep and chocolate bring people together?

This is a strange race for sure. It takes it's toll on people. Below, one of our teamates, Bill, catches a few moments of sleep in a field. Make no mistake, he is a tough runner, and a champion swimmer I've heard. Even he gets beat up in this trek.

But if you can finish this thing, a massive party awaits you Seaside. Live music, food, ceremony, awards, the exciting nightlife of downtown Seaside, etc. Below, you can see Blair enjoying some much deserved brew after completion of his very first Hood to Coast. The stoic Chris Burr sits next to him, enjoying the sunset from a perch in the beer garden.I have run in the Hood to Coast Relay four or five times now. My first race was in 1998, and every year that I am in Oregon, I try to do it again. In fact, I just sent out our team's $1080 entrance fee check to sign up again for 2006.

So if you have the guts, the grit, and the desire to abuse your body for 24+ hours, I’ll see you out on the open road in late August. Just ask around for free chocolate and people will point you my way.